Friday, June 03, 2005.

i nV knew in life.. in such a short period of time.. one person can undergo a horrible emotional rollarcoaster.. i experienced juz moment ago.. u guyz mite think tat jeanne is juz so emotional.. u r wrong.. i m totally hurt.. hurt by my parents.. esp my "mom".. i juz feel tat my life is so screwed up moment ago wif my mom around.. saw tat my father is really in bad mood n he is simply troubled wif the fact tat he isnt able to claim back his $$ from all the fucking jobz done.. i din wanna add on to his troubles so i juz hang on to my SIM stuff..but i noe i din haf much time to do so.. i had to tell him wat i m planning to do the next step.. i onli wished to tok to him alone but my irritating "mom" juz refused to go sleep so i had to tok to both of them.. n wat the hell.. watever i say.. my "mom" juz interupt n shoot my wif words tat i refused to hear.. she juz cant keep her fucking irritating mouth shut.. i had to tell her several times to shut up so i can finish letting my dad noe the full plan of wat i m going to do next.. but guessed wat.. halfway thru.. "mom" said something really upsetting n awful.. she juz dun like the idea of me going SIM n she juz dun wanna let me go coz it was ex.. she is does not deserve to be my mom.. coz she had nv given me any form of encouragement.. i saw from many ppl's blog.. is like their parents r worried about their tertiary education n even console them when they gotten rejected and r willing to provide them other opportunities such as going overseaz or pursue other form of studies.. but wat r my parents doing? they nv help me share my troubles.. they nv had any form of console n plans (in termz of $$) for me.. i noe they decided to let me decide for myself but y cant they juz ask how is everything going on when it is like june already.. i m utterly disappointed wif them.. esp my so called mom.. i juz hate her.. i do seriously.. she juz keep bringing up the fact tat i failed GP n tat coz i din wanna quit dragonboating tat's y my results r as such.. but i did tried k.. they din noe i had a hard time trying to figure out every little stuff about uni myself.. y cant they gif me their support for my own future.. my "mom" said tat they were relax n ez n tat they gif us total freedom of the schools we wanna attend.. but look now.. she is trying to stop me from going SIM n feel tat it is my fault to get such horrendous results.. yes.. i noe i deserve such fucking grades.. but wat is done is already done.. wat can i do.. y cant she be like other moms trying to supportive.. it is not like as though i din noe how is the financial means of my family.. i had a serious dilemma as well.. i had to go thru myself.. i had enuff.. but hu ever noe tat i m having a real hard time out here trying to swallow the pain myself n put up a smiling face.. n guess wat.. my " mom" actually scolded me for crying or should i say sobbing.. it is not like as thou i can stop.. i can control.. when one cries too much, u will start sobbing.. how did the whole talk end?? i went back to my room wif a "bang!" n we came to no conclusion.. i hate my family.. esp my "mom"... she will nv hold any importance to me... i HATE my MOM!!!!!!

{ 6/03/2005 12:08:00 AM }

narcissism.

jEaNne Neo
14 mAy 1986
TaurUs/tIgresS
mFps, xMss, nyjC and sMa-sch of managemeNt
lOves sunFlowers, roseS, puRple, perFumes, clotHes!!!!, shOpping, eatIng, hangIng out with freNz, golden tAn n my family

materialist.

i want this

A better working environment
Good break
Sleep
10kg of fats off my body
Driving license
New cupboard.. i need more space for my clothes!
Killer abs so i can pierce my bellybutton!
Treat my family to dinner
Degree
A shoes cupboard for all my shoes!!!

voices.

memories.

February 2005 March 2005 May 2005 June 2005 July 2005 August 2005 September 2005 October 2005 November 2005 December 2005 January 2006 February 2006 March 2006 April 2006 May 2006 June 2006 July 2006 August 2006 September 2006 October 2006 November 2006 December 2006 January 2007 March 2007 April 2007 May 2007 June 2007 July 2007 August 2007 October 2007 November 2007 December 2007 January 2008 March 2008 May 2008 July 2008 August 2008 September 2008 December 2008

thanks.

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