Saturday, September 17, 2005.

i m juz sooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo tiRed! at work right now.. but geri not in so i juz come online to do some updating... nothing much happening but! i m getting fat! really fat! have been eating too much fast food... sweet stuff! argH!! then again... where did my self discipline go? god... i m bingeing (izit spell thi way? heck caRe la) on food.. this is wat i notice... i dunno y..
i seems to be stressed out but i dun even noe at i m stressing over??? *puZZled* over $$$? over family? over work? over frenz? over size? or over ...? i haf absolutely no idea! there r so many things on my brain.. mayb tat's the reason y i din even realise wat i m stressing over? dad juz gif me a call this money while i m on the way to work n i seriously noe it is not a gd.. yeah! i haf guessed it rite... he wanted to borrow money from me?? this pathetic me? i m damn poor one lor.. helped my canoeists pay the chalet n the stupid bills... these r getting beyond my pay-cheque n my ability to sustantiate all these.. i noe i should reduce my spenditure in clothing n shopping n on food... haiz... sometimes.. it juz make me wonder y m i the 1 out of so many ppl @ this age who had to go thru so much more.. i noe it will make me stronger.. but sometimes i juz feel so blue.. n there r juz so many "if only" and the utmost reluctance to grow up or rather to noe more than i should at this age.. at this age of 19! i juz feeling so tired... tired of everything.. tired of working late hours, tired of trying to be the strongest in the family to make sure everything is right, tired of not being able to study, tired of always trying to find the right guy(whAhha!) n end up meeting the arseholes!!!, tired of putting a smile yet behind those smile r tears n heartaches, tired of always putting a strong front even though at times i juz feel like crying out loud, tired of not being able to lean on a crying shoulder for me!!!! i m juz so TIRED! but nevertheless.. i noe i m not gonna let myself juz fall down like this.. i will hold on till the day i die??? probably.. haIz!!!

{ 9/17/2005 11:47:00 AM }

narcissism.

jEaNne Neo
14 mAy 1986
TaurUs/tIgresS
mFps, xMss, nyjC and sMa-sch of managemeNt
lOves sunFlowers, roseS, puRple, perFumes, clotHes!!!!, shOpping, eatIng, hangIng out with freNz, golden tAn n my family

materialist.

i want this

A better working environment
Good break
Sleep
10kg of fats off my body
Driving license
New cupboard.. i need more space for my clothes!
Killer abs so i can pierce my bellybutton!
Treat my family to dinner
Degree
A shoes cupboard for all my shoes!!!

voices.

memories.

February 2005 March 2005 May 2005 June 2005 July 2005 August 2005 September 2005 October 2005 November 2005 December 2005 January 2006 February 2006 March 2006 April 2006 May 2006 June 2006 July 2006 August 2006 September 2006 October 2006 November 2006 December 2006 January 2007 March 2007 April 2007 May 2007 June 2007 July 2007 August 2007 October 2007 November 2007 December 2007 January 2008 March 2008 May 2008 July 2008 August 2008 September 2008 December 2008

thanks.

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